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Survivor's Ed
Survivor's Ed
How to NOT die first in THE THING
We've got '80s spaceships. We've got sinister-looking dogs. We've got shapeshifting aliens. And we've got hella flamethrowers. This week we're talking about John Carpenter's 1982 sci-fi horror, The Thing! Kurt Russell, Keith David and a whole bunch of dudes, give each other side eye in the snow, and it's glorious. There's a couple of black guys in this mix, so we're taking a look at how to not die first when your friend's disembodied spider-head is after you.
that's like a ill-ass like little caveat to have like on your resume like oh I see right here that you were a flamethrower guy like he's playing her guy for a little bit yeah you know i burnt a couple burnt a couple species of my younger days yeah before i went into law school you know i cut my teeth as a torch man and then i upgraded to the flamethrower i burned a couple [ __ ] i hurt a couple of them hello welcome to survivor's ed how to not die first in a horror movie i'm chris i'm tawny i'm miles and we are two blacks and a mexican and we like scary movies so this is a show where we are exploring some scary movies of varying levels of quality and more specifically diving into that uh age-old question does the black or brown person die first um we're also just examining in general these movies and what rules for survival we can take away from them and this week we are talking about john carpenter's 1982 film the thing which is uh based on a novella who goes there and stars kurt russell uh keith david uh the guy from the diabetes commercials yeah wilford brimley and just a really nice cast of dudes of dudes with lots of hair dudes in snow with lots of hair um so this movie uh is sort of a alien invasion movie um but it is more so kind of a claustrophobic horror film a claustrophobic horror film with a whodunit to it some have said that the among us game is loosely based on the thing and i can kind of see it so these guys are trying to figure out who the thing is throughout the film and the thing is wreaking havoc i think that's the basic plot of the movie anything i'm missing here um the miles favorite part where they show the spaceship at the beginning his favorite he's all like man if they didn't show that spaceship i'd be like man this movie's wack yeah like like don't even don't reveal that immediately like i i would have been like had i gone into blind like into this blind and not known anything about you know this movie and they didn't show the spaceship i'd be like yo what is happening right now like yeah there's way more mystery you're like especially with the opening scene with the dog and the helicopter you're like yo what is happening right now that [ __ ] is a genius yes like and it's like there's a couple of points in the movie where like i'm a little bit like i'm not the huge john carpenter fan like i there's stuff that works for me and stuff that doesn't and stuff i like of his and stuff that i don't um but that [ __ ] scene with the dog like it's so scary because that dog is a good [ __ ] actor i don't know where they found that dog i don't know yeah like i don't know how they did that but that [ __] dog he's like in every scene where he's supposed to look just like menacing and he's right there like he's like really good impressive he's so good why is the dog so good that dog that dog is pretty solid though like because you believe like yeah you believe him for sure absolutely and i i wrote down she shut up chris one of the notes i wrote like midway through my like 75 like tiny pad like teeny little pad notes that i wrote was like the acting direction in this movie i don't know if it's the direction or if it was just like the natural talent of the of the cast but like the acting is great and i don't know if that is what for me like makes this one of the best carpenter i mean and i think most people agree this is him at his height like this is him at the height of his powers that [ __ ] dog just nails it and it's so creepy because the nor the guy's screaming in norwegian like no one knows what's going on like it's just it's such a great opening and so menacing and it's like they did not need the spaceship yeah because the spaceship looked like the the uh elo cover from like the 80s and [ __ ] like i don't know if y'all familiar with that band album cover from the 80s like it just looks super like okay yeah don't don't add this like because everything else is practical in the movie and it looks so legit and that like just completely throws it off like this yeah the spaceship is mega random so um this is kind of the what's the situation section of this show and we're really gonna walk through how we feel about the movie in general um for me yeah the spaceship unnecessary but you know it's a it's a minor flaw i would say um i think the the the thing that really gets me in this movie is uh every time i every time i watch it is that there is like you can re-watch it and watch the characters that you know are the thing at that point and kind of try to discern it but there's no there's no tell you know which makes the creature that much more creepy um and so like there's a lot of scenes where i'm just like oh he's definitely the thing in this scene and i'm sitting here watching it and i'm like yeah but and so you get that yeah so it's like carpenter just almost felt like the carpenter didn't tell which he probably did but i don't know i don't know for sure what the behind the scenes of it was but it's like did he not tell them whether they were the supposed to be the thing or not or did he just tell them don't you know just just play it normal even if the character actor does know that they're the thing whatever the case is like the acting like you said it really helps it's perfect and it's just like um i was reading you know this the scene the first person they show like being uh assimilated is the it's the silhouette it's great and it's like i'm looking at it going okay who is that like that's the guy with the poofy hair like and i read that like they it's it's really supposed to be um what's his face the cr like the crazy one palmer um it's sort of supposed to be him but they but carpenter wanted it like they tried using him and it was too distinct of the silhouette so they actually got like a stunt guy to do it because he just like because it wasn't clear so it wouldn't be clear and it and it's just every single like and i think that's what like one of the reasons that like i have to watch this movie and really pay attention to it to really take a lot of stuff in is because of that kind of stuff like you cannot tell at any given point like there's no tells and i keep like i keep i was looking at like reddit and stuff and it was like people are trying to be like well clearly it's this signal and i'm like that's the whole and we were talking about this chris about hereditary when people are like well is it mental illness or was it supernatural and like that's the wrong question you know like the question it's not who like you're you're not supposed to be there's not an answer and that's the whole terror of this movie you know yeah yeah that that's like i think that's like the dopest part like about this like i i think like we said this is like one of his like carpenters like better works like this is really good like that's what i was like that's why like the spaceship throws me off like at the beginning so much like he's so subtle like like i like the scene where that like you were just talking about where the dog like goes in the room and it cuts from there like just the dog goes in you don't know who that is technically it's just a silhouette i'll just love that like the setup for that and then everything after that is like dude you really are you it's like it builds on like your paranoia and just suspicion like slowly and slowly like everybody is just paranoid and suspicious of everybody else and the moment somebody like breaks away from the group is like all right you go outside and go over here no because as soon as you go outside like i feel like nah yo you it like as soon as you break from this group the ranks it's like you're suspicious immediately when you when when they return so this is this one is super solid man and then it's even better like that it ends like without it's no resolute ending like it's pretty much just like yeah it's like yo this is so ambiguous at the end it's like this is him really he's going he's going crazy with this one like it's it's pretty good yeah i love the i love the the tone from start to finish the um i must have a thing for a horror in snowy like snowden climates because you know similar to the shining uh there's this kind of ominous tone it's less it's obviously a little it's got a little more camp to it than this like desolation but uh yeah that that idea and the in that they don't go into deep explanation about you know even the fact that it's just the thing and then the uh the the research sort of just tells you yeah it's bad it's just it's gonna do bad stuff that's all you need to know it's gonna take yeah it's gonna be bad it doesn't matter they're jamming their hands into it yeah yeah and uh i mean we cannot cannot talk about the thing without the talking about the defibrillator scene which really like yeah that's great always gets me like there's few movies i can watch as many times as i've watched this one and that like always get like this little chill go that goes up my spine with that scene because it's just it's so well edited like it's it's so perfectly edited to that it it it feels super visceral it feels more realistic than movies that come out today and that and that is gross as hell yeah it's just nasty as [ __ ] like intangible absolutely and it yeah the practical like and i was just watching it going like yeah okay it's not like i'm looking at [ __ ] that guy's head walking across the floor going like oh that's realistic but it doesn't matter like it's so grotesque and it's so like this stuff of nightmares that it doesn't even matter that i can maybe see that it's like clay or whatever yeah yeah like it like those creatures like there's i don't i was just like i was marveling at them today going like those are the [ __ ] some of the best movie creatures that have ever been created are so crazy in this movie so creative so awful like so grotesque so like um what's the word like uncanny right like the valley of the uncanny yeah yeah and it doesn't even really have like uh uh the fact that it doesn't have like a specific form like makes it even more like horrific like it changes so much each time and then even when it goes into whatever form it is it's so incomplete and like it does it just makes it even more like disgusting this is so nasty it's because it feels like it's like an intelligent force of nature because it like just takes whatever form it takes and to survive and keep going but then it also is clever enough to assimilate something and not get found out you know i mean like it's such a cool way to do it and one could one could could view that as like a plot hole or something it's like well you know but in reality it's just that's just what makes it so terrifying is that you don't know you don't know enough to know whether what it's doing is you know what it's right like there's the whole scene i think blair sort of is like the the case in point right like when he starts to go crazy and you're like oh he's going crazy because he like sees what it's going to do and he wants to stop it you're like was he or was he just trying to cut off communication you know like you don't and then you finally spit like that's you know i think you know that grandpa wilford brimley um you know that's like so creepy like you don't like you know you're sort of assuming because you're being shown even like these people in private when nobody else is around and you're sort of assuming oh this is telling me that they're safe but it's not yeah you know like we can't take anything for granted it's yeah there's so many but it's like okay this guy can't be and yeah that doesn't matter it doesn't matter he will wreck you too uh yeah and like the i think the uh sound design too like oh my god those scenes like the sound of the creature is so oh my god bennings yeah that that like it's just such a whale yeah and it just keeps going and kind of pulsing you know what i mean and uh that'll mess you up that's a that's a sound to that's a sound to reflect on when you're laying in bed at night yeah seriously i wrote in my notes oh dave what's that ice cube once he makes it makes and this one is like i'm not as familiar with i haven't seen it as much as like anaconda like i like i've seen it like a couple times but like re-watching it like re-watching and i was like damn this is like really well made like i was thought that it was a good movie anyway yeah but like watching it now with like a more critical eye i'm like damn this is like this is like damn good like this is i would rather like if i'm talking about carpenter like i would rather watch this than like halloween like absolutely i would watch this over halloween like like hands down like it's way more interesting to me than like halloween like and that and that's obviously like one of his you know highly regarded works as well but like this [ __ ] is like i could watch this like i watched it like twice like and i you say that and i don't think the thing if i remember my research right was i don't think it was well received when it came out um yeah that's what i read yeah or at very least it wasn't commercially i don't think i was only three so i don't remember first time i mean there's a there's a lot of films like that though like that we like later on like we discussed or like younger generations were like yo what this is crazy like oh y'all like like i think it's a specific quality too that carpenter has like i think and i think like like for the reasons that i said he's i'm kind of hit and miss with him like there's stuff of his and i'm like i don't like this at all and there's stuff that i'm like this is awesome yeah and there's that like he walks this sort of line of like between like genius and like trashiness and sometimes they even you know like he's kind of like pollinated yeah and i'm i'm good with that but and then sometimes it just works for me and sometimes it doesn't it's probably like a personal choice but i think this is like one of i think this is a master work for him yeah he's like kind of like paul if you're hoving in that way where it's like yeah sometimes it's like too much it's like are you trying to is it supposed to be like this ghost of mars watch it okay so i think i think carpenter's strength is forces of nature something that is an unexplainable killing entity that he can then that way you don't have to try to explain it it's just there and then you can just have fun with all the effects with his brilliant like scoring and sound design and uh you know play in his his his sandbox because that's a good point like he plays his strengths like i think maybe he knows like if i try to explain this this is not gonna it's gonna turn stupid real fast real stupid and it's like if the more the more vague i keep this probably like the more successful this is i mean same thing with halloween it's like i we don't know anything about why any of this is happening and it works and the more we learned and the more we learned it was like oh hell nah no that's not what it is i don't want to know anymore and granted that's not really him coming up with that but still like yeah but it just shows it's the power of a mystery it's the power of our imagination to fill in those those gaps so uh one other scene i have to bring up before we get into uh what what happened with our our black folks in this one um the blood test scene right here yeah we gotta talk about the blood testing that's a great scene oh my gosh first of all first of all the first time this proposition comes up is the the doctor right he's like i was thinking about a blood test serum where you did this and you do this and then you find this i'm like what is that based on is that baseball and there there will be a reaction and i'm like what does that mean yeah if you really think about like just the cons like the conceit like that's happening in the scene it's like get the [ __ ] out of here this man just makes no sense and he tries to hang his hat on that he's like but i came up with the blood test yeah but it's that blood test was trash bro like it just happened to have worked like yeah you put it together and then it there's a reaction and you're like what why what why would that happen like yadda yadda that one yeah yeah it was it was something like it's trying to survive and if you threaten it then well the hot wire worked a lot better than what the doctor had proposed there's a i mean there is a yeah there's like a very very very simple logic to it but doesn't leave room if you tug it too much you know you start to be like just leave it just leave it alone it's like well then how is this power these people like if any singular little threat like a hot uh wire would cause the blood to go crazy like that like how is it walking around yeah you know i mean but we you know we almost everything when you get close to it it should just do that the heat it start getting hot right it's not everywhere there's blood all over the place like at that point like it's spattered everywhere like pieces of like viscera just flown around the whole camp like i always had issues with like i hate when like i see in movies where people like easily can like take a knife and just like cut their finger or whatever like you know i'm never doing that like yo somebody's gonna have to do that for me and probably yeah i can't do that strap my wrist down because i'm gonna i'm gonna pull back as soon as the knife gets closed because one of them did like a pretty severe looking yeah like yo what are you doing man it was a little bit it was like up and down and uh yeah that's what when we were watching it my wife was just like why is this is this like a man thing that you have to like just saw somewhere that i'm like okay i don't know maybe like my arm forearm or something where i can yeah somewhere real quick where i could just wrap something on there really i cut my cheek before i cut my hand exactly because your hand you gotta grab like yo stop it man that's yeah that was terrible that was pretty crazy but the the actual test so what gets me and this is my wife screamed out loud during the scene and she's watched this movie a good two or three times um because it's always it's that great like you know the bigness of carpenter's imagination like in your head the scene every single time it feels like it's gonna be like a oh you know it's gonna like sizzle or something like that and then it's like blood hand comes up oh yeah it's just such a like like it's such an outsized reaction that's what makes you jump and uh and then it's carried through when homeboy starts spazzing out a blank expression the spazzing with the blank expression is the creepiest yeah and it's the same thing as when benning shrieks because he looks normal but he opens his mouth in this like monstrous noise yeah it's creepy it's gross yeah it's good well it's it shows again great editing and pacing because it every time i want to say it happened last time we watched it my wife said like right after the flood thing she's like well then it's him and as you're saying she's saying the word him it's when it cuts to him doing the shaking thing and it's just like it's it's following the viewers through line you know what i mean it gives you time to react and be in at the at the blood thing yeah it doesn't just immediately cut to him you see the characters all react and then it and then we get to him and by the time we get to him we're right there our brain is now shifted to oh but then that means it's him yeah that guy right there who's shaking and uh i like i always like feel the tear or two of them like being strapped into that chair and oh my god yeah like when your or something flies in your window when you're driving and you like can't really you can't really like hop out and [ __ ] like maneuver around it like that happened to me too one time like or like a spider there was like a spider in my car one time that like came down and[ __ ] like uh like right down in front of me like slow as hell and i was like oh oh [ __ ] are you trying to dodge it but you can't really go over the tear it's just like because yeah you can't oh it's a perfect analogy i feel them right now because there's nowhere to go and you tied up there's a mod literal monster tied to you basically i mean at this point and uh and then the flamethrower is not not doing his job and just that scent yeah it's really good and uh that i love that scene um i actually love that in the defibrillator scene more than i do the ending kind of the climactic scene i think it's because the mystery is still there by the end now we've kind of had our big reveal we've seen we're seeing the monster in its most kind of epic state and the again the design is amazing um uh but it is it is the ending is slightly kind of anticlimactic in the sense that we don't get full resolution but i think that works i think you you're supposed to walk away a little unsettled and a little like you know you're looking at childs you're like uh i don't know and then it just ends yeah and um i like that because if i if it kurt russell wasn't kurt russell because i saw this movie like way after obviously i saw it after it came away after it came out but i saw it way after you know late lake when i was an adult and i feel like i never thought the thing was gonna be kurt russell because it's like well he's like he's gonna be fine because he's kurt russell but like you can tell the movie at points wanted me to think it was him and uh or could have been him it's never resolved why his jacket's found torn right yeah exactly yeah and i think but i think that's i i think that's the whole point i think like i think like whatever it is that john carpenter does like even when i don't like his stuff like i think the ambigu like i think there's an ambiguity to a lot of what he does we're like you're not supposed to feel okay at the end and i think the fact that like they never resolved why mccreedy's [ __ ] turns up all torn up is like it's worth thinking about and i and i love it and that like that's this is exactly what and again like and again to go back to hereditary which i talk about constantly but like the it's the wrong question of like who's the thing really like that's not the question like the movie's not about who the thing is or isn't the movie's about like how does it [ __ ] feel to not know who it is or is it yeah yeah that like paranoia of is is like the key to this like and that makes it successful because like the whole time is like you're you're paranoid like even with the main character like and that's not often where you're suspicious of like the main character right i mean yeah he's pretty much the main guy i mean it's kurt russell so and like those things like you said it's like that's never answered and like a part of me during the movie i was like is is there something suspicious about him or is this like just a decoy that the thing is doing to like you know mislead throw off throw people off like i don't know like yeah and then by the way and then by the end it's like yeah i i really don't know by the end like point like because it could be anything at that point and i feel like that's perfect like and i agree with you chris like the the last final like little scene or whatever it's cool but like that the the defibrillator and like the just earlier scenes where like we get to see like what you know what's going on is revealed those are like way more like just like extreme to me like those are like crazy and then like it's sort of just like the matter of fact like that end point like the one uh what's the dude on the skates what's his name again uh no no we don't know what happened brewster's teacher mike all i think of is mike leave it to tommy to bring punky brewster into this i was obsessed with punky brewster like she was like my hero as a little i was like that was my age right like she was a little bit older than me and i was like that's mike sorry yeah but like you don't we don't see like what happens to him either like i mean in all likelihood he gets killed but i don't know it's unclear so it's like man like they they really leave you like wondering like by the end of that like okay what the [ __ ] just happened like yo like what and what is about to happen yeah let's use that as our transition because um the second part of the show you good homie how did our people of color do our two so we had two black men in this movie uh gnaws and childs and uh how did they do we don't know yo not with the shits at all like the whole movie he was voodoo you know it's funny when he said voodoo i couldn't help but think of princesses yeah he he was not with it he didn't have time for none of that [ __ ] like he's the one that said and i love this and they they give this line to him and it's almost like he says like if i like if i was like what do you say like if i wasn't me how would you know right like and that's the [ __ ] question yeah yeah like that's the central question of this that's literally yeah that's what's going on and that's him saying it like if you if i wasn't me how would you know and there's not a there's nothing like you got nothing yeah yeah it's interesting because he both of these characters nazi kind of he kind of he's in and out of the story yeah like and uh he's on roller skates yeah you introduced it's interesting because he's introduced in a kind of as it he's probably got the most interesting introduction just because he's rolling around on the roller skates he's doing you know and uh he just kind of stands out to me as a character not just because he's a black guy a bunch of a bunch of white guys but just as a character but he really doesn't have a lot to do in the movie uh and so in my head i remember the first time i watched i was like he's gonna be the thing or something because it's like we're not seeing them enough but they've it's almost like you you throw this distinct looking character out there and then you kind of hide him in the background it's like oh yeah he's gonna you know um and so i feel like he did well through most of the movie because he made it pretty far and there's that hilarious scene i can't tell if it's intentional but how each character who finds out they're not the thing suddenly is next to kurt russell with the flat thrower oh yeah yeah it just looked good yeah i was like what there's just a hard cut and there's another guy with a flamethrower i love it uh i i really i feel like if we're talking about how they did you know they both made it far yeah we just don't know like what that actually means for them when the credits roll right i don't know if you know and i don't even know if that like if it matters whether or not whoever is whatever but like i think it's significant like in this film which is 1982 right like to have the two black characters make it farther than most of the other characters and not turn into horrible monster zones horrible monsters on screen first of all there were two black characters two black characters like that's that's already like set and new like we on like new horizons right there right right that alone like yeah two black characters and they don't make it to the end like okay yeah progressive thinking okay absolutely like and but like he he makes like the worst mistake like i feel like he's cautious like he's like terrified right like after everything pops off and then he makes like the worst decision ever like towards the end where he just like goes to like investigate for whatever[ __ ] reason like yeah you wouldn't do that you know like you like this whole movie you've been like terrified to be like why wouldn't why wouldn't he just call that out like hey yo because you saw something yeah that was suspicious oh no i'm like yo why would you just go investigate you know what's happening that's where you're like hey why is he doing that like he like this is the moment where you like go like communicate with the rest no no well we down one we lost somebody it's just us now how about we don't split up anymore how about that yo they were determined to split up into teams like every five minutes i was like yo stop doing that like yo we all gotta stay and let's all handle all of this together literally in a situation where like you need to make sure that everyone's clean how are you gonna send people off right like in teams it's like even if everything goes fine and you come back together now you gotta wanna you gotta do rubber band them together like i like and like one of the things i love about cabin in the woods is the joke where like they they're like we all stick together and then they drug them they're like let's split up yeah because it's completely it's completely illogical like there's no reason we would just have to go investigate all of this together i know we can cover more ground if we split up but no yeah and the cover more ground thing is always funny there's such a throwaway line we can cover more ground like who why who cares why is everybody so obsessed with covering more ground like i want to see one movie where they're all back to back kind of going and one person is just so mad they're just like we're just covering so little ground right now because the problem because the problem is is like when you do split up and you cover more ground like er the base the base of the end is not that big it's like yeah and you're in the middle of nowhere so everything that we could see like in here is like okay then covering my ground is pointless because it's like okay once we split up now we have to take more time to find each other again so you might be covered you was wasting time but the ground y'all we got to cover it we got to cover the ground with our blood apparently and you got to cover more of it but no yeah so we got knowledge we got childs and childs from the beginning like and i almost feel like it's a slightly deliberate um not beaten switch but like we're supposed to be able to as the audience we're supposed to be able to rely on kurt russell right like that he's clean and we don't and we can't and we can't and and i almost feel like um i almost feel like you know like car like that's a very deliberate move um to throw like the last [ __ ] black guy in there yeah and be like you don't know yeah and i think it's really interesting yeah there is something about that and like the uh the nature of their they have an antagonistic relationship throughout and so it kind of adds that layer of like i already don't like you and now you might be a horrible monster too that's not right yeah and so there's an interesting dynamic at the end where they're both kind of like and i like that laugh where it's just like yeah i mean this is kind of crazy right truly it's truly ambiguous yeah and that's something that american audiences are not funny like they like suddenly like uh give you kind of a little bit of like backstory i guess on like childs like when they're all figuring out like who's supposed to get the gun and it's like a little bit of like character like develop another yeah development where it's just like oh okay now we know who the like the the hot head is in here because they like oh hold on hold on someone with a more even character and they're like oh okay okay damn all right it's like he's an angry black man right child's is but like it doesn't feel like that's necessarily written into the design of his character that that's who he is he's angry and he's like ice cube said i am angry and i happen to be black you know it's kind of the vibe i get is that keith david is just playing that part man like he he and his character is kind of he's speaking truth though like throughout the movie he's just he's dropping like facts like hey look like i'm in a situation where anybody in the room with me could be a monster like i'm not trusting y'all i'm not trusting anything you say at all i'm absolutely not like yo what are we talking about right here like and y'all keep splitting up man like yo what is happening like who keeps who's i'm gonna make a note of who keeps suggesting splitting up you know like uh all right y'all let's test everybody blood and everybody just tested and said all right let's all split up and go off into different places where we can't see each other why did we just do that not tested each other like i was a pointless ass like yeah not like i kill him he's yeah he's got a problem so uh yeah so this is the tricky one right like when we talk about how they do we ask you good homie we don't know we don't even know if they're still homie by the end of the movie so uh i would say though generally they did do good in this movie um we didn't see an on-screen death of a black character that's nice um and we you know it's implied i guess we can pretty much presume that niles is no more whatever that means yeah he should have kept the skates on like he should have stayed inside and kept the skates on skating around the [ __ ] out of yeah you got to be like swifter than everybody else with the skates on like yeah yeah i just think like to me and maybe this is just my own like personal[ __ ] but like there's something about that last scene that says these two people are equal and i i don't know like i don't know how to quite qualify that but like you really and i and again i was already expect going on there's some yeah there's some sort of acknowledgement of like you didn't see this [ __ ] you didn't even i think i would guess that most audiences especially given the premise of our entire show didn't necessarily expect childs to make it he shows up at the end and you're forced to reckon with the fact that not only did he make it but mccready might be a [ __ ] monster yeah and i think that's fascinating yeah and i think that that given the nature of these two characters i feel like that can lead us pretty smoothly into our rule um so we kind of decided that the rule that we took away from this movie is that two things needed to be true you needed to be the guy behind the flamethrower and you needed to be the manliest man in the room masculinity and fire were essential to surviving this movie absolutely so let's talk about that a little bit perfect combination like like i said in a text like what we've learned in movies is like nothing living likes to be burnt the [ __ ] up like it just doesn't no there's no movie where the fire doesn't work any movie aliens all of that [ __ ] like just burn that [ __ ] up get some fire and burn that[ __ ] up and i guarantee you he'll stop his ass mars like i came to where i came to where there was snow no fire i presumed i was to understand there would be no fire frozen in a block of ice i get out the ice and y'all got i got like a lot of flamethrowers like this i picked the wrong place a lot of fuel here on this place that was the other thing i was like yo the tanks that they got like for the for the flamethrowers is like i don't know what type of like they never ran out of like fuel like aside from the time where like the flamethrower just like was malfunctioning for convenience sake yeah like they just never ran out of fuel and they never refueled them like they just like showed it infinite ammo bro yeah video flame thrower yeah yeah video game flamethrower like yeah you got the flame floor though you won you're good you won because nobody want to get set on fire bro i'm telling you guys i don't give a damn what if you're a creature or not like i literally was thinking about that i texted you guys like i like the other day i was like i don't know what i was watching what the [ __ ] did i say like i even like i was like i was watching something and i was like yeah i got it's gotta be a flamethrower that's the only thing i mean here's the thing like i think flame like we learned in uh once upon a time in hollywood that there is something inherently like masculine at least in our minds or tough about the idea of a flamethrower building fire yeah wielding fire yeah is that like why dudes are like obsessed with grilling is that it's something sure there's something primitive there for sure like you asked me to cook a meal and i'm going to do it begrudgingly but you asked me to ask me to throw it on the grill with an open flame i'm talking about some different dynamics now with the flame out there like i gotta open flame like and i'm controlling it and [ __ ] like with the charcoal like yo listen yeah it's like the strategic charcoal placement exactly yeah i'm controlling this uh element and [__ ] i'm the captain now right exactly controlling this element i mean because like that's the coolest [ __ ] like if you could like some pyro like uh x-man [ __ ] like if you could control fire that's that's cool like harnessing fire like yo come on man yeah that's why my uh eight-year-old is obsessed with when we watched uh avatar that last airbender my eight-year-old is obsessed with zuko principle because he's a villain and uh he wields fire and he does cool flip kicks and shoots fire out of his hands and it's like that's what's up and so trying to storm like come on yeah he's just a complete ball of fire like he's like oh yeah when we love things we say that's fire exactly exactly it was the symbol by which man showed early intelligence was about creating fun um so yeah i mean i think there's something it's child's like child's flamethrower dude like that's cool like he's flames over dude like i don't know how you get that job i don't know what the application is like but they're like do we need the flamethrower go get child like is that a certificate that's like a ill-ass like little caveat to have like on your resume like oh she right here that you were a flamethrower guy like her guy for a little bit yeah you know i broke the couple burnt a couple species of my younger days yeah before i went into law school you know i cut my teeth as a torch man and then i upgraded to the flamethrower i burned a couple more because i burned a couple of them david well let me tell you about this one guy i flamed him up god that voice like i'm looking at him through this movie and he's just like like he's just like leaning slightly forward and his eyes are just he looks like a [ __ ] panther or something yeah and he looks different he looks different feline about him in this movie that is like fast i kept looking at him going like how does he look like that he doesn't normally look like that but there's something about the way he's shot well he's like aged interest he had he aged interestingly i'll put it that way like he kind of like is weird it was jarring to me because for a second i knew he was child it's like and then while every time i watch the movie i'm like that's yeah that's him he's always so different though yeah yeah yeah and as he i i guess i'm used to my head seeing him about 10 to 15 years older 40 50 years old he actually looks older he looks better as like an older gentleman yeah he looks strange to me i was like yeah and i don't like this it's making me uncomfortable there's certain actors like that like morgan freeman too just like nah nah he's supposed to be he's supposed to be old man uh yeah so wielding fire being sort of super masculine it's all it's a crew of all guys and the more blue-collar-ish kind of guys uh make it to the end uh which is is also interesting and then the more nerdy science-y guys become the thing or get killed or get just straight up killed and that's also an interesting thing because uh again like is that part of carpenter's messages like which i'm sure it's not necessarily inherently wasn't inherently his message but is it a message we can take away in terms of just having a more uh feet close to the ground kind of perspective down to earth so to speak gives you more of a lens on what's going on around you more of a tangible touch more of a less of that egghead sort of high level understanding that could get you to overthink things and and get yourself thinked yeah because like in this type of situation like we don't need philosophical questions answered right now like we're trying to stay alive capable of staying alive because like childs is like a pretty i mean he's like a pretty big dude like and like kirk russell i mean they both look like like i mean child's just looks menacing like so it's like yeah i'm i'm rolling with this guy not the dude that can explain you know the theory of relativity like i don't give a[ __ ] bro we don't we don't need philosophy yeah let's just solve problems right now we have one problem in front of us and that and like can you burn it up like you this literally take uh blair out of the equation and they would have i mean yes he figured out stuff that we as viewers are able to use but generally like once people start dying and get assimilated and it's like there's some weird stuff going on there's only a little bit of knowledge a little bit of that knowledge you need to know in order to be like yeah you're like okay all right cool we know oh there's a monster in here and it's one of us bet okay let's figure this out whereas he's over here kind of calculating and you know they're like and then losing his [ __ ] maybe as an alien or not who knows you know he sort of goes into the realm of like not attached to reality and childs and mccreedy are like firmly attached to reality and there's like there's an earthiness and they're pro in both of their performances it's just like what the[ __ ] do we need to do let's do it or like get the [ __ ] off me i'm not it you know like there's like a just like like there's just like an earthy like i'm not like a like complete groundedness and reality that that gets them through yeah and then once you find out that there's not them and they're like all right now untie me and watch out whatever that flame throw around let me see let me see hold on let me see that yeah it's like like at this like this is like the time where it's like yeah there's there's no time to think it's like you don't have time to think and that's like um it's like being in a street fight like i don't know if i've ever been in a fight before but it's like there's no time to like you just don't have time to think like you don't have time to do anything like you just have to try to die yeah like get a table do this do that go you go do this you do that and i'm like oh [ __ ] oh okay the table's for because he knows he's gonna come at him he's gonna shoot and like there's just this whole like i'm dealing with this situation practically um element i don't know like how well i could outsmart a wild animal like like maybe my entire fight that's the thing it's like maybe my intellect helps me a little bit but then at some point like his like just superior like power and speed and everything else is like i don't care you doing all this thinking and [ __] like yeah listen i'm a wild animal like i will kill you like and i know how to kill effectively and that's this thing knows how to kill effectively and all you all you can do is just react and try to survive a flamethrower yeah get behind a flamethrower and burn his ass up yeah i mean that's the thing too is is there's a soldier kind of quality to these guys who survive and in the end i think that's part of that laugh that they share is that like you know you think about two soldiers who may you could have a guy you can't stand and you got and you go into war with that person and you're like man this dude you know i can't stand this dude we don't like nothing none of the same stuff we argue all the time but then you fight in this war and then you come out on the other side and it's just you and him you got to be thinking like hey you know what because you respect who he is and uh there is that question of are you the thing are you the thing but ultimately it's like well what does it matter at this point if you if you're it i'm dead right now right and you ain't killed me yet so here we are you know there is like a there's a camaraderie that kind of swells in that moment yeah that's true it's like either yeah yeah and it you know that's totally true it's like um you know like what else do we have now yeah yeah like the world's about to end or not i don't know but yeah and it's just us and we're gonna die in antarctica uh unlike many movies from the early 80s even the ones i really like this one gets me at some points every time you know it's just like so disgusting because you forget you forget stuff like it's not one that like i just throw on all the time so i don't remember i don't and it's not on a lot either it's not on no it's not yeah whereas like halloween is just constantly on so i've just seen it and same thing with like anaconda i've just seen it so many times this is one of those ones where i get surprised every time like yeah i forgot like when he's on the table that i know that's gonna happen but it catches me off guard almost every single time i'm like damn i forgot about that [ __ ] those practical effects man they're good i mean those are just some [ __ ] amazing monsters like truly the stuff of nightmares they don't make any sense like there's no like they're completely anatomically alien to like what we are like it's just it's just so unsettling and like gross and like yeah they're not even practical to like be in that form like that's not even like the most like convenient way for it to get around or anything it's just like nah i'm just about to look crazy as hell yeah but it's like so it's uh it's yes there's an inconsistency to its functionality like the most genius the most probably genius moment it has is the spider head kind of thing yeah where it just kind of are you [ __ ] kidding me yeah yeah i love that but like the way it kind of just falls the head falls off and then grows the legs and kind of that's so clever though that such clever design from a behind-the-scenes standpoint but even just the idea of it kind of getting old getting where it gets yeah before they notice it and stuff it's just it's kind of liquid it's kind of fleshy yeah it's kind of the the scene i wrote down it was like the scene where like wilford brimley sticks his hands to we got a completely normal set of human organs i'm like you what excuse me that's so gross what he's got like we got a normal heart i'm like you don't know if that's normal like what are you talking about it's inside whatever that is that already right renders it completely abnormal exactly what are you talking about what are you talking about bro like this is completely abnormal like it might be the same size like get out of here man yeah it's inside of a weird warped twisted dog head yeah like it's not normal all right chow well this was a lot of fun um again this is survivor's ed this is a series where we are diving into all kinds of horror movies and talking about how you survive particularly if your skin is a little melanated so uh this is going to be a weekly series we're covering lots of ground i won't give too much preamble of what's to come but we're gonna split up to cover more ground yeah we definitely gotta split up the cover more ground so much ground so much look so much ground is gonna be covered y'all you can't you're not even ready for the amount of ground that's about to be covered you should do an episode where we're by ourselves talking about to cover more ground right covered ground that'll be the uh the name of that episode all right y'all well thank you for tuning in thank you for being a part of this uh please comment if you're watching this on youtube um you can also check us out on spotify apple podcast stitcher and if you're checking us out on apple podcast please be sure to leave a review that helps us kind of get bumped up in the algorithm and whatnot share this with folks uh engage with it uh subscribe follow whatever you you gotta do to make sure that you uh catch this series um so so until next time get your flamethrowers grow some hair on your chest and remember the chameleon strikes in the dark he got like super james bondi on the last like razor ira like remember remember that the chameleon strap strikes in the dark we will see you next time you